Time, on my terms.
I tend to identify as an introvert. Mostly because I like to spend a fair amount of time alone, with my dog. I would hazard a guess I'm actually more of an ambivert. Or, perhaps just stubborn.
This past week has been a bit overwhelming, in a lot of ways, capped off by losing my job on Wednesday. Following that, I was with my sister, or other family members for all of my waking hours, followed by having several friends over to the house last night for supper and games.
The last 3 days of being home and seeing family and friends have been great. However, its been seriously devoid of alone time.
So while most of the family is off camping this weekend, I've opted to stay home. When I woke up this morning my original plan was to spend a significant chunk of the day in meditation, do some writing, some yoga, and play the ukulele for a bit, and then go for a walk with my friend.
As is usual, that's not exactly how my day turned out.
I did one meditation for about 20 minutes. Then I took Radar to the pet store because they had raincoats on wicked sale, $6.00 for the win.
Back at home I gathered my coffee, notebook, pen, and laptop, and headed for the couch, determined to do some writing. But as I sat down, I realized I had NOWHERE to set my coffee, except on the floor. I was so annoyed by this that of course the first thing I did was open my computer and start googling Sofa Tables. Since I am now unemployed I was swiftly turned off by the prices at furniture stores. So then I added DIY to the search terms.
And what came up? Well, wouldn't you know it, the hipster-est of hipster trends, shipping pallets.
Well, then I was inspired. So after finding a DIY idea I liked, I traipsed off to the backyard, unloaded some stuff from the back of the old truck, and headed off to the industrial park, looking for free pallets.
I finally found a stack at Kal-Tire, after checking it was ok, I parked near the stack to pick my pallets. Of course, the nice ones weren't on top... So I had to unstack about 5 before I got to the two nicer ones in the stack, and then re-stacked the others since I'm a polite person.
I hauled my pallets home, got out pressure washer and gave them a good once over. By then it was 2:30 pm and I needed to get in the shower so I could get to our "Play Music on the Porch" ukulele party at Kavaccinos at 3.
We played and chatted for about an hour and a half, several friends showed up and sang along with us, and we even had a random guy from Edmonton stop to chat for a few minutes, and he played us a quick song as well.
Immediately after that I retrieved Radar from home and headed into Red Deer to meet Kelly. We had a wonderful long walk and talk through the trails at Heritage Park, in spite of the forest fire smoke that has settled in again.
So, in all reality, it wasn't actually a day of much solitude. I didn't spend that much of it alone. And I didn't spend much of it doing particularly relaxing things.
So, I don't know if its so much that I need exclusive solitude, with no people around (though I do really enjoy that), but that I need a day spent on my terms. Where I make all the decisions about what I'm going to do, and I don't have to answer to anyone else, or really consider anyone else's wants.
Days like this, all on my terms, are so important for my mental health.